Came across this awesome site of Joel Sartore, a contributor to National Geographic. He "documents endangered species and landscapes in order to show a world worth saving."
I plan to purchase some of his photos (wouldn't they be nice gifts?), but for now, enjoy!
There are many things I never noticed til I was a mama. The joys and difficulties of breastfeeding and pumping are one. Thanks KQED for airing this: http://www.kqed.org/a/perspectives/R201201250735
I still am not used to saying "kids" as in, "I'll pick up the kids if you buy cheese." Or, "I have 2 daughters," when introducing myself to someone. Incorporating Tesla into my life/identity was one thing, but having kids is more of a shift. Maybe because the majority of my life now really is about raising these 2 little spunky ones.
I don't mind it; as tired and busy as I am, I love all the little moments with them. I love seeing them interact (Tesla is an awesome and caring big sister), and love how Aila is such a smily girl and is super attached to me (even though I definitely need breaks from her). Whenever I remember to, I focus on the moment, the now, since Aila and T are growing so fast. I observe myself carrying Aila, holding Tesla's hand as we go somewhere, like remembering for a future self when years from now these moments will be SO precious to me.
And it's the mundane everyday that is so sweet. I try to capture these moments however I can.
Here we were at the downtown ice skating rink on a Sunday late afternoon.
Aila standing more and more, as her proud sister watches. Happy Aila, wearing her grandmother's sweater, Dav's adoptive mother who raised him (whose middle name is Tesla's middle name).
Tesla on Friday, when she doesn't have to wear the school blue/white color uniform. She goes all out when she can, and I actually love watching her figure out her style. She likes pink and fluffy, can you tell? But she also has a goofy part to her which is a good balance.
Wearing her raincoat in Golden Gate park (from Mieko-san).
Sisters. In the bath. They are so cute together, but I won't plaster the internet with the gazillion pics I keep taking ; )
Together watching a recent Chinese Lunar Festival performance in which T partipated (see video below). T loves having Aila with her at public events. See how tightly T is holding A?
T playing music she "wrote." At the Regenbogens.
I used to do a butt series of Tesla. I do still with Aila, but don't post em much.
Aila learning about give and take, with Thurston. Cute!
T's doremi performance at the Chinese Lunar Festival.
A year before I met Dav, when I was living in Tokyo, loving my very own apartment and relishing a Tokyo lifestyle as a single woman, I bought a very nice piece of furniture for myself. It was an antique Meiji era chest of drawers with some unique elements not commonly seen, such as sliding doors between the drawers. The right side with drawers behind the locked door is also a nice detail. It was a significant purchase, solidified by my mom's approval with her excellent taste.
But then I met Dav, and although we discussed him moving to Tokyo, it made more sense for me to move to S.F., and I left my beloved tansu with my mom, then at my aunt's house, for all these years. I was waiting for a friend with an expat deal to move to CA so I could tuck my tansu in their shipping container. Having inquired the cost to do it myself, it was not worth shipping unless without some special arrangement.
Last year when my mom was here for Aila's birth, we happened to visit Kiku Imports near Japantown. My mom brilliantly simply asked if the owner, with his frequent importing, would be willing to help me bring my tansu over. He was very kind, and offered to do so at cost only (about $200) which is very generous. I still can't believe he did this for me!
Here is my tansu, and I can't be happier to be reunited. It was a bit weird to initially see it in my "American" home, almost like by having the tanus over here, it means I am rooted and settled here even though a part of me still identifies with living in Japan. Slowly but surely my life is building here, and it makes me a tad sad since my parents are in Japan...But it is so nice to everyday get to see my tansu.
We took on a lot this year, but it was for good, and I am so happy and in love with my family. Got lots of support from friends and family during some challenging times - really appreciated that. I look forward to recharging and enjoying 2012. I wish you a great New Year!
For the 2nd week of T's school break, I signed her up for winter camp at Tree Frog Treks. T is having a great time, and I am super pleased. Since T is going through her pink pink princess fluffy stage, I am thrilled that she is outdoors all day, digging in dirt for bugs, building fortresses, learning about animals and science, and just getting out of her regular routine. The staff is awesome, and I just love that this organization exists, taking the kids to fully explore the neat outdoors of S.F.
Their office is full of cool beings - tortoises, an albino snake, turtles, lizards, and other things I just don't know the same of. T initially was shy, but she has warmed up to them.
I don't think T ever jumped into a big pile of leaves. Such a city girl. But here she did!
This year we actually got a lot of Christmas. It's been low-key in the past, but this year, Tesla requested from months ago to get a "triangle tree" so we did. We went to a nice lot down by the Embarcadero overlooking the bridge, and let T choose one. Smells nice! Lizze added a wreath on the door, and the house was ready.
We had a few decorations from the past where we decked out a houseplant, but since we had a whole tree this year, I invited folks over for a crafty afternoon, and we made decorations.
Thanks to generous family, we actually had tons of presents under the tree.
I took a day off from work, and took Tesla to see the Nutcracker. What a beautiful fancy show. While we waited for the doors to open, they showered gentle fake snow. When we walked in, all kids got a teddy bear, and at intermission, they served free cookies and juice. The show was gorgeous.
We got to pose with dancers before the show.
Another night, we headed to my brother's street in Alameda that is famous for the whole neighborhood show. They have a santa there (who spent a lot of time with each child) (my brother has been Santa; neighbors take turns), and a mailbox to Santa that actually resulted in a letter back to Tesla signed by Santa. And there was a show of dancing christmas trees, I kid you not.
And finally, Christmas Day: T woke up at the crack of dawn, but I made her let me snooze until at least it was light. Then the opening fun!
Aila got many cute things and toys, including these precious bunny slippers.
After breakfast, we went to the Aquatic Park Beach by Ghirardelli Square. T attempted to ride on a bike (and strained daddy's back since he had to hold her up), we settled on the beach for the afternoon, and let T get crazy sandy/dirty/happy.
Love is a temporary madness. It erupts like an earthquake and then subsides. And when it subsides you have to make a decision. You have to work out whether your roots have become so entwined together that it is inconceivable that you should ever part. Because this is what love is. Love is not breathlessness, it is not excitement, it is not the promulgation of promises of eternal passion. That is just being "in love" which any of us can convince ourselves we are.
Love itself is what is left over when being in love has burned away, and this is both an art and a fortunate accident. Your mother and I had it, we had roots that grew towards each other underground, and when all the pretty blossom had fallen from our branches we found that we were one tree and not two.
Having kids together definitely brings a couple closer in ways one doesn't think about until there are kids. Before, we were 2 individuals who came together because, well, we dug each other a lot. That hasn't changed, but now we have many more layers in who we are and what we do together.
I remember before Tesla was born, my main concern was maintaining my closeness to Dav, and I vowed to make that a priority. I still do, but we are in that intense mode right now where keeping healthy food in the fridge, kids clean, and a modicum of sleep is also priority, so by the time I have a moment for Dav, it is in short snippets only. In those snippets, we relish a long hug, or a kiss (Tesla now thinks it is funny that we kiss, i.e. we are just her parents, not 2 people in love). And we know at the end of the tunnel, we will enjoy our date nights again (ie. I won't beg to go home early because I feel the need to be with the baby), and hopefully get some of our old groove back.
But it's a journey. And through all this, I feel Dav and I are intertwining on a deeper level; our roots are growing together. Although we have less romantic time right now, I am appreciating the true team I feel we are being - building a family, building our careers, figuring out our long-term goals and dreams, learning what lessons we need to teach our children, and simply growing older together.
A long time ago, when I first met Dav on the playa but then flew back to my home in Tokyo, I wrote to a mutual friend that I had this feeling about Dav. Even though we had just met, I totally imagined us old together. Perhaps we'd be in some retirement home, he in a wheelchair that I'd push around. He'd wear a hat I had knitted, bright in color with cute animal ears on it. Or something like that.
Not that we are that old, but this period in our lives is highlighting what I noticed less before: the mundane everyday that we are creating together into a combined story. Dav is my romantic partner but also my life partner in all senses of the word.
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